In general I
don’t hate girls [For girls reading this, I am straight and single]. They are
the most beautiful creation of god, how one can hate them. They make a guy
smile without a reason.
I am not
against love marriages. I don’t hate girls who go for love marriage either. But
when a girl goes for love marriage without the consensus of her parents then I start
hating her. In nutshell, I hate all those girls marrying against the will of
their parents (with 0.01% exception).
Here is
thing. You fell in love with someone and you think he is the one. But your
parents don’t think in the same way. They think you are doing a mistake and I
think the same. And if you don’t think the same then you are WRONG. Because, I
believe, your parents who made decision for you since you were born and all
decision were in your favor, for your bright future, for your better education,
for your successful life.
When you
were in pre-school, you cried for a doll they gave you, because you were able
to convince them that this is only thing which can keep you happy. [Take a note
here, parents knew doll is the not the only thing which will make you happy but
still they gave you doll for your happiness, meaning you were able to convince
them].
Then in your
school days, you fight for a new cycle they gave you that too, even they had to
borrow some money from neighbors, only because you convinced them.
In your
college days, you asked for a laptop they gave you, even they knew there are
lots of nasty thing on internet which may destroy your career, life and
everything. But they believe in you, they trust you, you got them convinced
that you will do something which is good for everyone, you will learn, play and
be smart.
Now if you
are not able to convince them that you are going to marry a guy who loves you
and you love him back. Then take my words, you
are really doing something wrong. If you think you are not doing anything
wrong then try harder your parents will be convinced. Otherwise same parents
who did everything, from sleepless nights to twelve hours day of work just to
make you achieve the height of success, how the same parents can think anything other than your happiness, yours
future, your success. I don’t believe parents are wrong. If someone is wrong
it’s YOU.
In fact
according to me parents go against children love marriages only in case of
weird love. So, what do I mean by weird love. Do you think daughter of
prime-minister falling in love with peon’s son is right? No parents will allow
this kind of love and they are fully right and have all rights to deny your
bizarre kind of love. This kind of love stories are made for movies only. Ok,
so you are asking why they make this kind of love stories. Here is my view, do
you think they will show a movie where two compatible people fall in love,
everyone is happy, finally they got married and lived their live there after.
Will you go to watch this kind of movies; will it be a hit one? Yes, your
answer is right, big “NO”. Those kind of weird things are for movies which sole
aim is to attract more audience for them. So don’t get taken by this bloody
bizarre kind of movies and don’t make you and your parents suffer.
Let me tell
you one thing, your parents are biologically programmed to love you, support
you, care for you, secure your future. Their subconscious drives them to
protect you, teach you, make successful in live, sometimes even without letting
them know. So, you can and you should trust your parents blindly.
One day you
will be parent but what family values you will be having. What family values
will you teach to your children? What if your daughter will show thumb to you,
what will be your feelings?
You are
pride of your parents, your family, your village, your country. You should not
take this as a burden but as a pride as you have been given such a high status
in society. Do you think you should let pride of your loved ones let go?
Disclaimer: This is my personal view. It is not based on any living or dead person. If you find your life in this story it will be a mere co-incident.
13 comments:
I agree with previous comment. Why only girls?? Why not boys?
Its not only for girls...its for guys too. if you let the "title" go....then you can see, it applies for both guys and girls....I thought its pretty implicit.
Infact if i would have been a girl...i could have written something like this "So, Why I hate guys?"
Agreed 50-50,coz...lots of reasons...
but you have written a very senstive topic & very honestly...
good eforts....all the best....
pyar to ho jata hai bas,is per koi bas nahi hai.....
I know parents who went against marriages only for a stupid reason like caste!..Do you think girls/boys should not get married bcos of CASTE??..There is no simple consensus for this issue..sometimes parents are right, sometimes children are..both of them should accept and respect each others wishes and at the end of the day, its an individual's decision..and this is not a reason to hate girls!..
@Ana..
You are completely right. Parents can be wrong too. That kind of cases i have put in 0.01% exception.
"Respecting each other" is best solution...thanks for putting it up here ...I wish some parents/children(would be parent) would follow your idea...
Btw..Girls are too beautiful to hate them....
As you said it applies to both boy and the girl. I know parents should be respected and their happiness should always come first. But also there are a lot of irrational thinking parents who think their daughter should be married to the richest family (even if the groom to be is like 20 years older than the girl) or there are those parents who wants their daughter to be married to their family friend since their family has helped a lot in the family business. These are some of the situations that commonly occur in our society. So we can't completely blame a couple to get married without the consent of their parents. Parents are responsible for you lives till 18 yrs but after that we are on our own and we just have to be thankful that they gave us a life, shelter and education and lots of love. And love marriage or not, we should always be there for our parents in their old age.
The reason why you hate girls (which goes in as the title of this post) accounts to only 0.01% of the times that they get married without the consent of their parents. Don't you think your title doesn't so much justify the essence of this whole argument?? And most often than not, the reason why a girl could do this is because the guy would have expected it from her in the first place! So I guess you should hate guys first (also, guys are 'not' too beautiful to hate) before the gals!
@Neha..
You are completely right...mostly about ...
"we should always be there to help our parents [in their old age]"
In fact you are more right than me...If I would be able to pass-on your message to more and more ppl I would be more happy :)
Thanks for coming up with such a noble thought.
@Divya...
you are completely right about title-mismatch ...i have used it, 'coz i could find a better one...
I would be more than happy if u concentrate on idea of "obeying parents" than anything else..
I am deeply saddened reading this piece of article. It is unfortunate that you are so rigid about your thoughts at such an early stage.
We repay all our parents' love and care by giving the same love to our kids. That's how "biologically" we have been programmed.
Coming to your argument about convincing the parents. Well, if a kid had enough money to buy a bicycle he would more often than not just go ahead and buy it. there is no convincing.
Why don't you ask your parents for everyday advice on the code you write. Why don't you take their advice on food you eat - bad food everyday can actually make you sick for life. It will surely hurt your parents.
Why not ask them before buying a particular brand of clothes? They never wore "Tommy Hilfiger" and "Levis". They won't approve of the price tag for something that merely covers your body. Similar quality thing without brand is available for 1/5th the cost. Why not take your parent's advice on that?
Pardon me for my directness but you are being a bit less mature in putting your point forward. You may change your views when YOU finally have a girlfriend.
Your view here maybe "personal" but since you blogged about it and made it public - it becomes open to debate.
Disappointing and distasteful article. Sorry.
A real sad article and a showcase of the reason that why even after 65 years of independence India and Indian women is suffocating.
After reading this article i feel that God has again cursed the Indian society with another male chauvinist. And it is even more painful to know that despite of being technically educated, author could not imbibe maturity and sensitivity in his life. Rather i am thinking that when at this young age when he could feel like this then how rigid is he going to become with his thoughts and beliefs when he'll grow old.
At this point there is just one question bothering me i.e., "Was East India company not enough?"
Why is it always a girl who is expected to sacrifice, to understand, to adjust and to bear?
When a boy wants to marry his girlfriend he becomes honest and a noble man BUT when a girl wants to marry her love she becomes cheap, slut and the reason of hatred and disrespect.
And if we talk about about "respecting parents" then being a kid are we not free to ask for our needs from our parents. And if this is wrong then why didn't you think twice while asking for may be a new toy, or a new bicycle, or for good education or for anything else from your parents.
So, if we ask for being with the one whom we love then whats wrong in that? Why the question of caste, creed, religion, status, and the other factors comes in midst?
It is not always true that arrange marriages are successful nor it is always true that love marriages devastate.
If a girl is making her choice of person with whom she wants to spend rest of her life then i don't think she is doing wrong because at the end of the day it is her who has to live with the man not her parents.
People should understand that when parents do take care of us, we also take care of our parents at the same time. Its just that both(parents and kids) have their domains and liabilities.
Sorry for the direct commenting but i do not agree with the point you make. I think you should take these topics with more sensible insight.
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