It's not about you!

It’s not about your eyes,

It’s the way you wink.

It’s not about your hair,

It’s the way you lock.

It’s not about your voice,

It’s the way you speak.

It’s not about your eyebrow,

It’s the way you frown.

It’s not about your waist,

It’s the way you walk.

It’s not about your tattoo,

It’s the way you show [it].

It's not about your cheeks,
It's the way you smile.

It’s not about your lips,

It’s the way you kiss.

It's not about you,

It's the way you love.

Dedicated to 'her'.

हे दिल्ली!

हे दिल्ली!

तेरी दरिंदगी से,

दिल गया है 

मेरा दहल!

क्यूँ रंग रही है 

तू अबला के खून से 

अपना आँचल! 

क्यों सेफ नहीं मैं 

तेरे साये में आजकल!

तू ले अब खुद को संभाल 

वरना में लूंगी 

दूर्गा-काली की शकल 

और दूँगी कर 

हर भैंसासूर का कतल!

दिल्ली

तू ही दिल है, 

तू  दिल्लगी, 

अब दिल की लगी, हूँ  

करने आया! 

तेरा बन के, या 

बन के पराया,

तेरे साये में, 

बिताने आया, अपनी 

हर धूप -छाया !

अपनो को, 

करके पराया, 

किसमत को अपनी,

तराजू पे रख के, 

हे दिल्ली! मैं 

तुझसे 

मिलने आया!

समर्पण

आज ये 

फैसला 

सरे आम 

करता  हूँ, 

अपने खून का 

कतरा कतरा 

तेरे 

नाम करता हूँ !

जीऊँ तो 

तेरे लिए, 

ना बचे दूसरा 

उद्द्येश्य कोई, 

तेरी आँचल में, 

दम तोड़ने की 

प्रतीक्षा 

सुबह-शाम 

करता हूँ !

सच्चाई

हे प्रिये! 

तू 

समझती है,

मैं, तुझे 

भूल गया हूँ!

पर,

चाहे, हूँ 

मैं मंदिर में

या फिर,कोई 

मस्जिद में, 

अधरों पे,

तेरा ही, 

नाम मेरे, अब 

रहता है!

सोता हूँ

तेरा 

नाम लेकर,  

जगने पर 

तू 

याद आती है!

तू 

सपना है,

सच्चाई है,

तुझसे 

जीवन का 

राग मेरे!

मैं तो 

अभी भी 

तेरा हूँ 

पर, तू

हो गयी 

परायी है! 

---
Dedicated to "You" :)

आधी आज़ादी

आज़ादी के 

नाम पे 

मिली कैसी, ये 

आधी आज़ादी है!

जहाँ 

धर्म के नाम पे

लड़ रही 

आवाम है!

जहाँ 

क्षेत्रवाद नाम का 

रहता 

शैतान है!

जहाँ 

नारी को 

मिला नहीं, उसका 

सम्मान है!

जहाँ 

भूखा सोता 

हर रोज, आम 

इंसान है!

जहाँ 

भ्रस्टाचार

बन गयी, बात बड़ी 

आम है!

Love मैरिज या Arranged मैरिज

I always wanted to write on Indian traditions like “Arranged Marriage” but guess what I got even interesting topic to write on “Love Marriage or Arranged Marriage”. Thanks to IndiBlogger and SONY.

Being from a traditional Hindu family, being a strong believer of Indian philosophy, being inclined towards spiritual well-being of Indian society I always give preference to Arranged Marriage over Love Marriage. In my teenage days I have been in love with more than one girl and then it seems to me nothing can be as bad as Arranged Marriage. Now I can understand those were not love but infatuation. But with time comes maturity, I read few books on Indian tradition and spirituality. Now, I strongly believe in Arranged Marriage and here I am going to write in favor of Arranged Marriage.

Misconceptions about Arranged Marriages:

Recently I came to know so called gen Y, they like idea of Love Marriage because they don’t understand the Arranged Marriage. Below are few misconceptions about Arranged Marriage

It’s a Forced Marriage: Lot of people, even some of my close friends, they don’t like idea of Arranged Marriage because they think “a girl and a guy are forced to marriage” and “they are not allowed to ask what they want” in Arranged Marriage. Well, concept of Arranged Marriage came to our society from Child Marriage. Children were considered immature to take decision on complex matter like marriage. Then parents used to take decision for them. But those days are gone now. Child Marriage is illegal. Now girls and guys both are given more than one choices and it’s completely on them to decide which one they want to get married with. This is not forced, or is it?

Arranged Marriage happens only in India:  Today, arranged marriage is largely practiced in South Asia (India, Nepal, Pakistan, Bangladesh, Sri Lanka), Africa, the Middle East, and Southeast Asia and East Asia to some extent. This is what wiki says. I hope this information will give some idea about institution of Arranged Marriages.

Love marriage is challenging task: I have heard lots of people saying that Arranged Marriage is not challenging task. So there is no fun in choosing easy path of Arranged Marriage. Let me tell you one thing, in Love Marriage people just don’t care the happiness of friends and family. They just think about their happiness, their love. Doesn’t it look more selfish task than challenging one. In Arranged Marriage one has to take along two families and many more relatives, think about what you like, think about they like and try to keep keep everyone happy at the end of the day. I don’t know what your view would be but to me it is more challenging task to go for Arranged Marriage.

Love lasts longer in case of Love Marriage: A study in Jaipur, India a few decades ago found that people in love marriages were more in love for the first five years, while those in arranged marriages were more in love for the next 30 years. Read more here.

Self-arranged Marriage is Love Marriage: Before falling in love if you care or try to find out caste, earning, city, eating, smoking and drinking habits of her or his then it’s not a Love Marriage but it’s a kind of Arranged Marriage called Self-arranged Marriage. I am sure lot of people would have disappointed after reading this. But keep reading you will feel proud to know that yours is a Arranged Marriage.

How to judge which is better?

Divorce percentage in case of India is just 1.1 while countries like US, Australia, Russia and UK have more than 40% marriages result into divorce. Highest divorce rate is in Sweden 54.9%. While in that given list minimum divorce rate was depicted in India 1.1%. So, what you think is reason for such a lower divorce rate in India, yes you are right Arranged Marriages. According to UNICEF proportion of Arranged Marriages is 90% of total marriages happening in India. This data directly tells that divorce rate is far lesser in case of Arranged Marriages than in Love Marriages. So what is reason for Arranged Marriages to be so successful? Well this same question was asked by one of my friends in my college days when we were roaming around girl’s hostel to get a glimpse of our favorites one. This is what I replied:

“”In a love marriage girl and guy know all good things/qualities about each other. So, after getting married they don’t have any good qualities to display or discover in each other. Then they start finding short-comings of each other and this leads to fight and eventually divorce.

But in case of arranged marriage girl and guy don’t know good qualities of each other. So after getting married they display and discover good qualities in each other and praise each other in front of their friends. Before getting exhausted with good qualities they have a child and they forget to count short-comings of each other. Hence arranged marriages are more successful than love marriages. All burst into laughter which invited attention of SIS security guy and we all had to leave to our hostel.””

how women are made!

'In the beginning, when Twashtri (the Divine Artificer) came to the creation of woman he found that he has exhausted his materials in the making of man and that no solid elements were left. In this dilemma, after profound meditation, he did as follow: he took the rotundity of the moon, and the curves of the creepers, and the clinging of tendrils, and the trembling of grass, and the slenderness of the reed, and the bloom of the flowers, and the lightness of leaves, and the tapering of the elephants's trunk, and the glances of deer, and the clustering rows of bees, and joyous gaiety of sunbeams, and the weeping of clouds, and the fickleness of the winds,and the timidity of the hare, and the vanity of the peacock, and the softness of the parrot's bosom, and the hardness of adamant, and the sweetness of the honey, and the cruelty of the tiger, and the warm glow of fire, and the coldness of the snow, and the chattering of jays, and the cooking of the kokila, and the hypocrisy of the crane, and the fidelity of the chakravaka and compounding all these together, he made woman and gave her to man.'

Above excerpt is taken from The Discovery of India, which has quoted it from The Digit of the Moon.

ललकार ...

रामनाम जप ले  रे 

पगले 

पल भर में, पल

बीता जाये 

देर न लगा 

जगने में 

अब सूरज 

डूबा जाये 

जो रात हुई तो 

फिर से तू 

सोने की जिद्द लगाये?

इस निद्रा के 

चक्कर में 

दिन रात तू 

पिछड़ा जाये

कहीं ऐसा ना हो 

जब तेरी आँख खुले तो

तू खुद को 

अकेला पाये

और फिर 

सर अपना पकड़ कर 

रो रो पश्ताये 

अभी देर हुई नहीं 

क्यूँ ना तू 

फिर से साहस 

जुटाये

और दुनिया को 

दिखलाये 

तू शूरवीर 

आर्य पुत्र है 

जिससे सूरज भी 

शर्माये!

सावन का महीना

शाम की बेला
गरमागरम चाय
बरसती बूँदे
बाल्कनी में खिला
सफ़ेद फूल
मस्जिद की अजान
झूमते नारियल
मेरा अकेलापन
ऍफ़ बी की तेरी
प्रोफाइल पिक
मेरे डेस्क पे पड़ी
"आई टू हैड अ लव स्टोरी"

और लता जी का
"सावन का महीना.."
तेरी याद लाता है
एक बार नहीं
बार बार लाता है ...

Dedicated to: Indu ji

So, Why I Hate Girls?

In general I don’t hate girls [For girls reading this, I am straight and single]. They are the most beautiful creation of god, how one can hate them. They make a guy smile without a reason.

I am not against love marriages. I don’t hate girls who go for love marriage either. But when a girl goes for love marriage without the consensus of her parents then I start hating her. In nutshell, I hate all those girls marrying against the will of their parents (with 0.01% exception).

Here is thing. You fell in love with someone and you think he is the one. But your parents don’t think in the same way. They think you are doing a mistake and I think the same. And if you don’t think the same then you are WRONG. Because, I believe, your parents who made decision for you since you were born and all decision were in your favor, for your bright future, for your better education, for your successful life.

When you were in pre-school, you cried for a doll they gave you, because you were able to convince them that this is only thing which can keep you happy. [Take a note here, parents knew doll is the not the only thing which will make you happy but still they gave you doll for your happiness, meaning you were able to convince them].

Then in your school days, you fight for a new cycle they gave you that too, even they had to borrow some money from neighbors, only because you convinced them.

In your college days, you asked for a laptop they gave you, even they knew there are lots of nasty thing on internet which may destroy your career, life and everything. But they believe in you, they trust you, you got them convinced that you will do something which is good for everyone, you will learn, play and be smart.

Now if you are not able to convince them that you are going to marry a guy who loves you and you love him back. Then take my words, you are really doing something wrong. If you think you are not doing anything wrong then try harder your parents will be convinced. Otherwise same parents who did everything, from sleepless nights to twelve hours day of work just to make you achieve the height of success, how the same parents can think  anything other than your happiness, yours future, your success. I don’t believe parents are wrong. If someone is wrong it’s YOU.

In fact according to me parents go against children love marriages only in case of weird love. So, what do I mean by weird love. Do you think daughter of prime-minister falling in love with peon’s son is right? No parents will allow this kind of love and they are fully right and have all rights to deny your bizarre kind of love. This kind of love stories are made for movies only. Ok, so you are asking why they make this kind of love stories. Here is my view, do you think they will show a movie where two compatible people fall in love, everyone is happy, finally they got married and lived their live there after. Will you go to watch this kind of movies; will it be a hit one? Yes, your answer is right, big “NO”. Those kind of weird things are for movies which sole aim is to attract more audience for them. So don’t get taken by this bloody bizarre kind of movies and don’t make you and your parents suffer.

Let me tell you one thing, your parents are biologically programmed to love you, support you, care for you, secure your future. Their subconscious drives them to protect you, teach you, make successful in live, sometimes even without letting them know. So, you can and you should trust your parents blindly.

One day you will be parent but what family values you will be having. What family values will you teach to your children? What if your daughter will show thumb to you, what will be your feelings?

You are pride of your parents, your family, your village, your country. You should not take this as a burden but as a pride as you have been given such a high status in society. Do you think you should let pride of your loved ones let go?

Disclaimer: This is my personal view.  It is not based on any living or dead person. If you find your life in this story it will be a mere co-incident.

मेरा दर्द !

इस दर्द में भी कुछ बात है,
ये दर्द तो तुझसे भी खाश है!

अब तेरी रही नहीं आस है,
पर दर्द, अभी भी रहता मेरे आस-पास है!

ये तेरी खुशियों से भी पाक है,
ये तो तेरे होने का एक एहसास है !

मेरी जीवन में, दर्द ही एक बचा प्रकाश है,
ये तो जीवन का बहुत बड़ा पाठ है !

ये करता अकेलेपन का नाश है,
इसलिए दीवानों को आता बड़ा रास है!

ये नहीं रहने देता मुझे उदास है,
क्योंकी ये ले आता तेरी याद है!